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Friday, September 2, 2011

Auburn Tigers

This is an excerpt from the book 'The Totally Biased Guide to Southern College Football' by Pete Davis, available now on's Kindle for just 99 cents at:
And you can follow me on twitter: @petedavis1 
            Based in the plainest little city on the plains.
A quick internet search shows that Auburn really had won a national championship before 2011, although you may be surprised to find out ‘Field and Stream’ magazine actually handed out such an award.
            After their win over the Ducks in the national title game they now have just as many championships in football as Vanderbilt.  And they did it with less than half the IQ.
            The Tigers pride themselves on finding the best coach available with no stone left unturned.  Their searches take them to every campus and airport tarmac in America.
            The time spent searching for coaches is made up by their rather unique and quick way of choosing a school president.  The title is merely given to the booster who gave the most money that season.
            There is much confusion around the rest of the country about what exactly the mascot is, a Tiger or a War Eagle.  But this is at least one subject that Auburn fans are not confused about.  The mascot is a tiger.  War Eagle is their salute, their holler, their shout-out, their battle cry for help.  But as anyone who has ever driven the back roads to Auburn knows, and they’re ALL back roads, the real mascot is a roadkill opossum.
            Legend has it a War of Northern Aggression soldier found an injured eagle on an old battlefield and somehow managed to sneak it into the first football game in 1892 with Georgia at Piedmont Park in Atlanta.  At some point the eagle escaped his owner and flew around the field as the Tigers went on to score and win 10-0.  At the end of the game the eagle crashed into the turf and died, possibly out of sheer boredom, or it being downtown Atlanta, might have been caught in the crossfire of a horse and buggy drive-by.  For some reason the fans have taken this as a good omen and continue the tradition of shouting “War Eagle” at games, gatherings, church, christenings and honeymoon beds.  It also began the tradition of bringing an animal as a date to Auburn games.
            Eagle VII, or Nova, flies around the field before every home game, frightening the local livestock both in and out of the stadium.
            The games with Georgia are called the “Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry,” and “A Damn Good Reason to Drink PBR On Saturday.”
A meeting of the Auburn Booster Club.
            In 1896 before a game with Georgia Tech, Auburn students greased or soaped the railroad tracks so the train bringing the Yellowjackets slid past the depot and the players had to walk the five miles back to town.  That used up a lot of soap, but it wasn’t like it was seeing any use anyway at Auburn. This may have caused the 45-0 whupping put on the Jackets that day.  Georgia Tech got its revenge by having the Auburn grads call them “boss” at work every day since.
            Nowadays students put on pajamas and ride floats in honor of the Wreck Tech Parade.  The PJs are a nice break from their overalls.
If you like what you've read so far just wait until you see the rest about Auburn and all the other SEC schools, as well as Texas, Texas A&M, Clemson, Georgia Tech, Florida State and Miami. It's all in 'The Totally Biased Guide to Southern College Football' by Pete Davis and available for the price of a Whopper Jr. on Kindle at:
And you can follow me on twitter: @petedavis1

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